How to Raise Optimistic and Confident Kids

What does your child say to themselves when they look into the mirror? Do they praise themselves and feel confident, or are they critical and questioning themselves?

Confidence is how we feel about ourselves.

Research has shown key differences between individuals with low and high self-esteem.

Individuals who are low on confidence will often focus on not making mistakes, being cautious, avoiding challenges, and maybe being critical of themselves.

In contrast, confident people have a growth mind-set, like being open to challenges and coping well with change.

1. Reinforcement 

Reinforcement of the efforts than just the output is essential. Expressing your appreciation in the form of a high-five, praise, applause, or a reward can help the child feel valued and improve their self-worth.

Make sure to frame your praises to mention specifics of what the child did that you like. Example. Instead of saying “you are so smart” for finishing a drawing, you can say, “I like the way you colour the pictures” Praises, based on inborn skills, can make them risk-averse. Thus, praising effort and hard work will be more effective

2. Acceptance

Every child is unique and has some special abilities, skills, and interests. Complete acceptance of your child is vital for the development of their confidence.

When they feel accepted, they will be more comfortable in their skin, feel like valued beings

3. I am mindful

What happens around the child has an impact on their emotions and behaviour. They observe and imbibe from people they value the most hence, be mindful of your reactions during stress.

Use more positive statements and be more accepting of new challenges. While you speak to your child, instead of saying, “My work is so difficult, I can’t do it!”, you can try saying, “My work is challenging, but I will do it.

4. Safe space – with you 

Creating an emotionally safe space with your child is essential to build a close bond where the child feels free to express, make mistakes, apologize, seek an apology, and try again.

How to do it?

a. Not pick out differences but enjoy the uniqueness

b. Monitor Tensions and stressors in family, as it affects children easily

c. Understanding that every child is different, even siblings are different from each other 

d. Identify your child’s unique capabilities and reinforce it 

5. Encourage mistakes

It aids in the development of a growth mind-set. Help the children see mistakes as stepping stones to learning and development. As parents, we can turn mistakes into opportunities through our responses. Being encouraging and compassionate in the face of failures can help children develop a growth mind-set. They will be less likely to give up in the face of difficulty because they enjoy the activity and do not fear failures.

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